Snap Me Back To Reality

(disclaimer: can be triggering, this is a piece about self harming which I wrote when I was battling depression)

In my last piece about depression, I said I was going to be putting up some of the lyrics I wrote during that period. This one’s called Snap Me Back To Reality. I wrote it as a letter to my best friend, who I had promised that I’d never cut again.

Snap Me Back To Reality

Do you ever get that feeling
When you don’t know
What’s wrong with you
But somewhere in you is hurting
And you feel your world is falling apart

The feeling
The sharp piercing pain in your heart
And it has you clutching your chest
Like your life depends on it

I’m sick and tired of feeling this way
Just five little cuts (No)
Just four little cuts (No)
Just three, just two (No)
Please…just one (No)

Please
I’m crying
I feel like I’m dying
But to hid it
I’m smiling
To hid it
I’m lying
I’m lying
I’m lying

Rip my heart out
So I can be fine
(I’m lying)
Just one
Baby just one
Just one

I’m sick and tired of feeling this way
Just five little cuts (No)
Just four little cuts (No)
Just three, just two (No)
Please…just one (No)

Please
I’m crying
I feel like I’m dying
But to hid it
I’m smiling
To hid it
I’m lying
I’m lying
I’m lying

I think I’m addicted
I think I’m afflicted
I can’t stop
Oh baby
Butterflies don’t do the trick no more

I’m smiling but I’m dying
It feels like I’m dying
I’m dying

I’m sick and tired of feeling this way
Just five little cuts (No)
Just four little cuts (No)
Just three, just two (No)
Please…just one (No)

Please
I’m crying
I feel like I’m dying
But to hid it
I’m smiling
To hid it
I’m lying
I’m lying
I’m lying

Emotions keep taking over me
Especially from my past
Please call the doctor
I might not last much longer

I’m sick and tired of feeling this way
Just five little cuts (No)
Just four little cuts (No)
Just three, just two (No)
Please…just one (No)

I’m sick and tired of feeling this way
Just five little cuts (No)
Just four little cuts (No)
Just three, just two (No)
Please…just one (No)

To snap me back to reality
Reality…
Snap me back to reality

 

There it is. I wrote that 20th November 2015. 🙂
At times it flashes to my mind how messed up I was. But hey, I’m proud of who I became. I’m proud that I’m a surviver, that I won the battle. If you’re reading this and battling depression, I believe that it wont get the best of you. You’re sttronger than you know. Way stronger than all the demons racing your mind. You’ll make it through alive. Have faith, and hope. It will carry you through. Live on positivity.

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Take care,
Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year.

Mitchi

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