From a Broken Smile pt1

01__im_fine_by_peekabooga-d383a7r

You know,
When I think about it
I dont seem to matter anymore,
Ever since she came along
You could have waited till I at least left
Before you stung her along
My feelings dont matter anymore
Neither do my thoughts
Your problems, priority, you two, majority
It doesnt matter if  speak my mind
Reality, you’ll never understand, you never did
You claim to be there for me
How do sweet words come out of your mouth
And your expressions and action remain so cold?
It’s all about what she says and what she wants and what she did 🙂
I mean, I should be happy for you that you have a new one
Congratulations my dear, I’m happy for you 🙂
You used to be able to detect the ‘I’m Fine’ lies
Now my words slip through your fingers like fine sand from the sea side
Whenever I’m with you two, I wish things could go back to the way they were
When I didnt have to bottle my feelings up
Or lie to get out of spending time with you
I thought I finally had a friend I could rely on
But boi was I wrong
I expressed my worries about moving
But you shut them down faster than paparazzi spreading rumours
At times I wonder if you can’t feel any changes
Maybe you’re used to being all about yourself and your problems
I knew this was too good to be true
If you read this, you’d probably laugh it off
I know…or you wouldn’t say anything
That’s more like you
You once told me we were friends because we didn’t know anyone else
I’m happy for you
I’m smiling with a broken smile
Happy with a sad smile
I miss the girl I met on February 27th
Because she’s definitely not the one standing in front of me now
Because this one is colder than Elsa the frozen queen
The one in front of me is superficial and unreal
Much like a character out of the popular movie
That I never watched but everyone liked
I guess the only best friend you can have is yourself
Whoever says friends cannot break your heart has clearly never had friends before
But I guess you’ll never know
Cause you’re just as good as pretending as I am
This fake smile, will just keep smiling
While sobbing on the inside
Welcome to my world, unreal reality 🙂
First time is a mistake
Second time is by chance
Third time is my stupidity
Good night, while I cry myself to sleep
Over a friend I never had
It’s time to cry…brb

– From Her Broken Midnight Smile

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